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Post by Jason Dave on Jan 8, 2020 19:37:40 GMT -8
Hey guys, So I honestly have been a bit anxious with my recent RP. It's felt like my first real attempt at writing something with a sense of substance and I just wanted to get some people's opinions on it. I'll link the RP below, but any and all feedback is extremely appreciated! iconicprowrestling.proboards.com/thread/1059/rations-past |
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Post by The BombTrax on Jan 10, 2020 7:18:46 GMT -8
For me, I enjoyed the fact that this told me a lot about the character. Who he is, where he's been, and also flaws and strengths. The CD worked hand in hand with the promo to accomplish this. I had it pointed out to me that I didn't necessarily accomplish that in my own work, so it was easy to spot when I saw it in yours. Being unfamiliar with the character, the piece really helped to fill in the blanks while also being entertaining. I think most people can relate to sitting on a couch and talking with a therapist, and this was a great choice to play out those thoughts where you're looking back. It also, judging from the rest of the RP, shows character development in it's own right with how the character later speaks in the promo. I get the sense that the character pays attention to detail, and carries himself in a way that is more proper than most(well dressed, eloquent speech, etc.), while at the same time showing that he isn't perfect because he does have issues to mull through. It also ends in such a way as to imply that there's more to come which leaves me wondering what's really going on with this guy. All in all, good work.
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Post by Jason Dave on Jan 12, 2020 20:51:57 GMT -8
For me, I enjoyed the fact that this told me a lot about the character. Who he is, where he's been, and also flaws and strengths. The CD worked hand in hand with the promo to accomplish this. I had it pointed out to me that I didn't necessarily accomplish that in my own work, so it was easy to spot when I saw it in yours. Being unfamiliar with the character, the piece really helped to fill in the blanks while also being entertaining. I think most people can relate to sitting on a couch and talking with a therapist, and this was a great choice to play out those thoughts where you're looking back. It also, judging from the rest of the RP, shows character development in it's own right with how the character later speaks in the promo. I get the sense that the character pays attention to detail, and carries himself in a way that is more proper than most(well dressed, eloquent speech, etc.), while at the same time showing that he isn't perfect because he does have issues to mull through. It also ends in such a way as to imply that there's more to come which leaves me wondering what's really going on with this guy. All in all, good work. Late response, but thank you for taking the time and giving me the feedback! |
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